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  1. #1
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    Default can I pick your brains?

    Hey mammas,

    So this past year our oldest who was in grade one had a very very very hard year..not as far as education went, I feel her teacher at her school was amazing, but as far as other things went it was awful. I feel as though we really let go of some of the control we have to teach our children as we sent her off each day, coming home upset and discouraged.
    I feel called to homeschool, its not just some whim of an idea, its eating away at me and its screaming. My husband is not onboard, however sometimes shows a bit of an interest. I know this is something we are praying about that we would either way come on board united about.

    Tayven will be only starting JK, Im assuming its not much of a cirriculum or anything. I have read a lot about different styles and have loads bookmarked LOL. Alexis will be going into grade 2.

    Im thinking that because Tayven would only be starting JK, that it would be a good time to start, not to wait it out and see how another year goes for Alexis, I cannot have her go through what she went through before.

    So I guess Im just looking for stories on how you all took the plunge into it, encouragement, prayers etc, also if anyones significant other was not on board, how that was handled etc.

    Thanks Ladies xox

    Candace~ Christ-clinging, babywearing, tiedying, barefoot, nature loving, crunchy mamma of three~

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    so sorry MrsC.. that doesnt' sound like a good situation at all. I commend you for starting now to think about their future educational needs. thats awesome.. with you as a Mama and a teacher.. pretty freakin lucky kids

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    Hardest and best decision I have ever made. Sincerely. My DD was in JK, it wasn't going well. We had talked about homeschooling before we had kids but when it came time to start, my DD seemed suited for school so we gave it a shot. Surprisingly she was the one who struggled with it - not the academics but the atmosphere and environment. She changed over the course of a few months and would come home angry and anxious. She started to say she didn't want to go. We explored solutions with the school while we contemplated homeschooling. I talked to a few friends I knew who homeschooled and they provided a lot of insight and reassurance. DH and I decided we could give it a try and if it didn't work, nothing was written in stone and we could re-enroll her. Within a week of withdrawing her, she changed into the happy, relaxed kid we knew and know. But like I said, this is the shortened version of what we went through and in the midst of it there were lots of tears, questions and hand wringing.

    We are moving into our 5th year of homeschooling and the gifts it has brought to our family are incredible. A strong community of friends with similar values, freedom to create our own pace and do what we want when we want it, a close family unit, siblings who get a long and are able to play with children of all different ages, and most importantly the ability for my kids to learn what they want to learn at a pace that works for them. Which also translates into them having a good sense of who they are and what they like.

    I can't really offer advice on what it is like to have a partner who is not on board, but it is a common experience. If you join the Different Drum yahoo group and come out to one of the Chapters Chats that happens monthly for parents you will be able to ask questions of parents who have BTDT.

    Good luck making the decision.
    Mom of 2 girls, unschooler, feminist, runner and just general lover of life.

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    Maybe find out first why your dh is not into it. Mine was hesitant at first, until we discussed it and I realised he just didn't want the responsibility of having to make sure ds learned all he needed to know. I explained some about how you learn naturally progressing, like for example when you learn to tell time you learn some fractions, which yo ucan apply to counting money, or to cooking, etc.
    AND, he was fine with helping if it was stuff I had come up with - didn't want to come up with ideas on his own, which was fine by me. They did end up doing some stuff on their own anyway but it was their ideas.

    So perhaps he's just worried it'll be more work for him? Or is it hte judgements he is worried about, or the 'social' aspect?

    I wouldn't really do anything specific for jk; dd isn't going to jk, either, and I don't know that I consider her homeschooling. She probably won't go to sk, but time will tell. Just out of natural curiosity doing stuff in daily life, like making cards for relatives or playing games, she's learned how to print a lot of letters, what sounds they make ,etc.

    It can be such a fun and exciting journey with your kids

    Really the only reason we put ds in school was for a social life. He is a very social person, dh and I are not, and we didn't know kids near his age when we moved here. We don't count on the school for learning, beyond social learning, really.
    DD1 age 7 DS age 11
    "I will remember you." July/10
    Baby Elaina born October 28th, 2011. Making every single day that much more special.
    INTERESTED IN BUYING DVDS OF OLD KIDS' SHOWS. Mr.Rogers', Mr.Dressup, Polka Dot Door, etc

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    Quote Originally Posted by *allie* View Post
    Maybe find out first why your dh is not into it. Mine was hesitant at first, until we discussed it and I realised he just didn't want the responsibility of having to make sure ds learned all he needed to know. .
    This is the main thing I believe. We discussed it alot tonight and he says he's just not sure he has enough confidence to homeschool. He is trying to figure out how on earth we wille ver know if they are learning all that they need to learn. He talked to our pastor tonight who's wife homeschools their five kids and I think it helped him a bit of understanding the difference and about how most homeschool kids are actually more ahead of the game, so he foudn that interesting.


    Thanks ladies so much for your thoughts!!! We really appreciate it <3

    Candace~ Christ-clinging, babywearing, tiedying, barefoot, nature loving, crunchy mamma of three~

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    Expert Forum User flamingogirl's Avatar
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    I think almost everyone probably struggles initially with that “confidence“ issue about whether they can truly provide what their child or children need in terms of education. I am in that stage right now as well, as we have decided to homeschool DD starting this year. I can't speak to the issue of your husband not being on board, as mine is probably more excited about homeschooling than I am, but he may come around if he continues to seek out support and information.

    It's helping me a lot to talk to others who have already been homeschooling for sometime. I'm also trying to get more active and involved in the local homeschooling community (A Different Drum, KLC) so I can create a support system. I'm quite confident I couldn't do it on my own, but I believe wholeheartedly that homeschooling is a wonderful thing, and that I can do this for my children if I have a network of others with me.

    Best of luck to you and your family!
    Mama to TWO little sweetie pies!!







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    Quote Originally Posted by flamingogirl View Post
    I think almost everyone probably struggles initially with that “confidence“ issue about whether they can truly provide what their child or children need in terms of education. I am in that stage right now as well, as we have decided to homeschool DD starting this year. I can't speak to the issue of your husband not being on board, as mine is probably more excited about homeschooling than I am, but he may come around if he continues to seek out support and information.

    It's helping me a lot to talk to others who have already been homeschooling for sometime. I'm also trying to get more active and involved in the local homeschooling community (A Different Drum, KLC) so I can create a support system. I'm quite confident I couldn't do it on my own, but I believe wholeheartedly that homeschooling is a wonderful thing, and that I can do this for my children if I have a network of others with me.

    Best of luck to you and your family!
    The bolded part is key IMO. The community of other homeschoolers is so important to our family's success with homeschooling. Not so much for the academic knowledge but for the friendships, support and just the ability to bounce ideas off of. I mentioned in a separate thread that my daughter was asking to go back to school, which actually stems from a desire to do some things independently from her sister and likely even me. Another homeschooling mom's DD is experiencing something similar (although has no expressed desire to go back to school) and it is something we have been discussing over a period of a few months. Well this mom came up with an idea that will provide an opportunity to address the needs that my DD is having as well as her DD's. When I told my DD about it, she was ecstatic and said she no longer cared about school. That kind of collaboration and support is so very valuable.

    Also, it is easy to think that we don't know enough to help our kids learn what they need to learn. But we don't need to know everything or even most things - we just need to know how to find the information and more importantly teach them how to find it. Those skills will take them very far. I know several families whose kids have gone back to school after being homeschooled and despite not following a formal curriculum, the kids were on par or above where their peers were at in most subjects.
    Last edited by doulamom; 07-12-2011 at 09:33 PM.
    Mom of 2 girls, unschooler, feminist, runner and just general lover of life.

    Need a doula or prenatal classes? www.babeezeinarms.com

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    Children are not our own art products to be turned out well, but their own life work in continual process. -Jan Fortune Wood"

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by doulamom View Post
    Also, it is easy to think that we don't know enough to help our kids learn what they need to learn. But we don't need to know everything or even most things - we just need to know how to find the information and more importantly teach them how to find it. Those skills will take them very far. I know several families whose kids have gone back to school after being homeschooled and despite not following a formal curriculum, the kids were on par or above where their peers were at in most subjects.
    Precisely.

    Also, what makes anyone think that *school* teaches our kids “all they need to learn“? It doesn't. Not by a long shot.

    Have faith in yourselves. You will be awesome.
    "Show me your horse and I will tell you who you are." -- Old English Saying

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    We only did grade one, but I didn't look at curriculuum much if at all and I found just from going with what interested us, or what seemed logical to learn next, he was still way ahead in a lot of areas compared to public school. Now, his handwriting sucks and he can not spell lol but in math and science, for example, they were still doing stuff at the end of grade two that we had covered at home in grade one.
    He found that a bit boring, all the repetitive stuff, but at least having a handle on the material balanced out well for him because he took a bit longer to actually write stuff down, complete his work, etc because he wasn't used to time limits or others' schedules on his thoughts.

    I don't see anything wrong with teaching some stuff just because it seems like it is practical to know. Even if your kid never asks “How does temperature work?“ it's a topic I'd cover (just an example) because it's handy to know for everything from weather to cooking. Or same for fractions, your kid may not know the words 'one fifth' to ask you waht that means, but it is an easy concept to learn and helps when you want to cook, bake, share, build, design, tell time, count money, figure out prices, etc.

    Or if you're religious, there are tons of different curiculuum available for you! It's just harder to find that if you aren't religious, as we weren't. Many of the homeschool sites we found were geared to people doing it from a Christian slant mostly, or occasionally other religions.
    DD1 age 7 DS age 11
    "I will remember you." July/10
    Baby Elaina born October 28th, 2011. Making every single day that much more special.
    INTERESTED IN BUYING DVDS OF OLD KIDS' SHOWS. Mr.Rogers', Mr.Dressup, Polka Dot Door, etc

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    Quote Originally Posted by *allie* View Post
    We only did grade one, but I didn't look at curriculuum much if at all and I found just from going with what interested us, or what seemed logical to learn next, he was still way ahead in a lot of areas compared to public school. Now, his handwriting sucks and he can not spell lol but in math and science, for example, they were still doing stuff at the end of grade two that we had covered at home in grade one.
    He found that a bit boring, all the repetitive stuff, but at least having a handle on the material balanced out well for him because he took a bit longer to actually write stuff down, complete his work, etc because he wasn't used to time limits or others' schedules on his thoughts.

    I don't see anything wrong with teaching some stuff just because it seems like it is practical to know. Even if your kid never asks “How does temperature work?“ it's a topic I'd cover (just an example) because it's handy to know for everything from weather to cooking. Or same for fractions, your kid may not know the words 'one fifth' to ask you waht that means, but it is an easy concept to learn and helps when you want to cook, bake, share, build, design, tell time, count money, figure out prices, etc.

    Or if you're religious, there are tons of different curiculuum available for you! It's just harder to find that if you aren't religious, as we weren't. Many of the homeschool sites we found were geared to people doing it from a Christian slant mostly, or occasionally other religions.
    It will definatly have a Christian slant for sure. Thats very important for us. Im kinda relieved that Alexis already has foundation in writing and reading because if we do decide to go this way, then thats atleast one kid who already knows the basis for these things and is coming along quite well

    Candace~ Christ-clinging, babywearing, tiedying, barefoot, nature loving, crunchy mamma of three~

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    If you want a Christian curriculum, and you're a little worried about what/how to teach, you can always start with a boxed curriculum liked Sonlight, which provides everything you need for the year.

    Once you get your “homeschool legs“, you may find you don't need that support the same way and can mix and match curricula, or come up with your own approach.

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    Quote Originally Posted by LisaDSB View Post
    If you want a Christian curriculum, and you're a little worried about what/how to teach, you can always start with a boxed curriculum liked Sonlight, which provides everything you need for the year.

    Once you get your “homeschool legs“, you may find you don't need that support the same way and can mix and match curricula, or come up with your own approach.
    Thanks for the sujestion!! Sonlight I have heard is fantastic!!! although the price is way out of our range, but perhaps for certain subjects it might be something we look into. If we do decide we want it to be as cheap as possible since our income is really low.

    Candace~ Christ-clinging, babywearing, tiedying, barefoot, nature loving, crunchy mamma of three~

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    You could post on A Diffferent Drum looking for some used Sonlight -- I'm sure lots of Christian families use it.

    You'd probably do just as well with your kids at this age by getting a library card and taking out tons of books. Can't beat the price! (Word to the wise -- invest in a cart with wheels to take home your books. My kids always take out about 40 books and it's back-breaking, lol.)

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    Quote Originally Posted by LisaDSB View Post
    You could post on A Diffferent Drum looking for some used Sonlight -- I'm sure lots of Christian families use it.

    You'd probably do just as well with your kids at this age by getting a library card and taking out tons of books. Can't beat the price! (Word to the wise -- invest in a cart with wheels to take home your books. My kids always take out about 40 books and it's back-breaking, lol.)
    LOL That is such a smart idea! We have one of those carts actually! Although I think one of the wheels fall off from time to time! LOL. Something Im sure I can put on the hubby please do list LOL!
    And yes to the library! Guess I should pay my libarary fee (its only two dollars HAHAHAH!)

    Candace~ Christ-clinging, babywearing, tiedying, barefoot, nature loving, crunchy mamma of three~

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    My kids go to public school but I like to add to their learning at home as well. I use free 'Tot Packs' and 'Preschool Packs' for my kids and DC kids that are 3-6 years old. You can find them on a lot of homeschooling blogs (just Google Preschool or Tot Packs). You can print what you need and the kids love the themes and activities. If I can I put the sheets in page protectors and have them use dry erase markers or crayons so that they can be used by more than one child or they can be done over and over again.

    I also like to make a monthly sensory bin for them to play with - great for fine motor skills, sorting, etc. Again, just google sensory bin or tub. Hope this helps and good luck on your homeschooling journey!
    Jodie
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