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Tanya-Mae · 02-24-2010, 03:13 PM

Looking for opinions here....

"Typically" my kids go to their fathers over march break. I have asked my daughter what she would like to do... go to her dad's (Sudbury) or stay with me in Kitchener. She has told me both times I've asked her that she would like to stay in Kitchener. When I tell her that's fine with me but I am just curious as to the reasons behind her decision she does not have an answer for me. I've also asked her if she would tell her father the same thing (want to stay in Kitchener) if he were to ask her and she dodges the question... very non-committal.. but I do know that she wouldn't. She has troubles speaking up for herself. I have told her father this and she is beeing seen by a psychologist weekly for counselling for this and other issues. I have no problem telling him that she wishes to stay here and I also have no problem suggesting that he comes down here if he wishes to see the kids but I know he will have troubles with this. I will be accused of deniying him access. Just today I get an email from him saying he cannot come down for Daegan's b-day party this weekend because he is saving his money for the March Break. He is expecting the kids to be there, just because... suggesting from Saturday 13th thru to 17th or 18th. Daegan has a hockey game in Brampton onthe 13th and needs to be at Sick Kids on the 18th... both things he knows about if he were to remember the info I send him via email. I don't know how to handle this. What I do know is both kids travel as a unit... if Taylor goes/doesn't go, so does Daegan. Last year the kids (and I ) had no idea what was going on March Break until it was half over because he did not communicate. They ended up being there the final weekend of the break.. that's it. Previous to that they would spend the whole break there but then again that was before things really blew up between myself and his current gf and her mother (long story). I just don't know what to do. I do not want to force my kids to go if they do not want to but I know I'll end up looking like the "bad" person here and personally I do admit that I'd rather them just stay with my due to some of the games being played on the father's end but... in the end I want to do what my kids want. Ughhh... why must things always be so complicated? Having your children visit with the other parent should never be this difficult!

02-24-2010, 03:13 PM	#1 (permalink)
Tanya-Mae Senior Member Join Date: May 2009 Rep Power: 104 Posts: 2,462 No Classifed Ratings	March Break visitation Looking for opinions here.... "Typically" my kids go to their fathers over march break. I have asked my daughter what she would like to do... go to her dad's (Sudbury) or stay with me in Kitchener. She has told me both times I've asked her that she would like to stay in Kitchener. When I tell her that's fine with me but I am just curious as to the reasons behind her decision she does not have an answer for me. I've also asked her if she would tell her father the same thing (want to stay in Kitchener) if he were to ask her and she dodges the question... very non-committal.. but I do know that she wouldn't. She has troubles speaking up for herself. I have told her father this and she is beeing seen by a psychologist weekly for counselling for this and other issues. I have no problem telling him that she wishes to stay here and I also have no problem suggesting that he comes down here if he wishes to see the kids but I know he will have troubles with this. I will be accused of deniying him access. Just today I get an email from him saying he cannot come down for Daegan's b-day party this weekend because he is saving his money for the March Break. He is expecting the kids to be there, just because... suggesting from Saturday 13th thru to 17th or 18th. Daegan has a hockey game in Brampton onthe 13th and needs to be at Sick Kids on the 18th... both things he knows about if he were to remember the info I send him via email. I don't know how to handle this. What I do know is both kids travel as a unit... if Taylor goes/doesn't go, so does Daegan. Last year the kids (and I ) had no idea what was going on March Break until it was half over because he did not communicate. They ended up being there the final weekend of the break.. that's it. Previous to that they would spend the whole break there but then again that was before things really blew up between myself and his current gf and her mother (long story). I just don't know what to do. I do not want to force my kids to go if they do not want to but I know I'll end up looking like the "bad" person here and personally I do admit that I'd rather them just stay with my due to some of the games being played on the father's end but... in the end I want to do what my kids want. Ughhh... why must things always be so complicated? Having your children visit with the other parent should never be this difficult! Last edited by Tanya-Mae; 02-24-2010 at 07:23 PM..