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  1. #1
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    Default Am I not helping him enough?

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    Last edited by 2xmom; 09-26-2009 at 02:06 PM.

  2. #2
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    I am sure you are doing a great job! Obviously if your DD is talking early that is proof that you are not doing anything wrong. My DD goes to tyke talk and I never thought it was me. But then I am the perfect mom! Just keep up what you are doing and he will come along at his own pace. Nothing wrong with that!

  3. #3
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    Last edited by 2xmom; 09-26-2009 at 02:06 PM.

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    I hear ya. My DS (now 5) was a delayed talker. I went through TykeTalk to help him - got all the advice it sounds like you're getting. I loved the TykeTalk people but honestly, I don't think a single thing we did there made the slightest bit of difference. He talked when he was ready to, which wasn't until well after he was three. We also did the preschool route to get him going, and it took a while to kick in. Now he is 5 and he never shuts up! It makes me wonder what my hurry was. Oh, and he wasn't toilet trained until after 4. And I tried absolutely everything.

    Now my youngest DD is in TykeTalk. She is even more delayed than he was. She is in preschool and we're doing everything we did with him. The main difference this time is I'm not as worried as I was the first time. I am just now starting to see the effect of preschool and she has been there since September. She'll talk when she wants to and when she does, I'll wonder what my hurry was!

    I'm sure you're doing everything you can to help. Some kids just talk late and I think everyone freaks out a bit too much. Last week I was talking to someone and I mentioned about all my kids being delayed with speech (which they all have been so far - don't know about Jack yet) and this moron said to me "why?, don't you talk to your kids at home?". Idiot! Back in the old days I would have been terribly hurt by that and worried that he was right and it was all my fault, but now I just think he's an idiot. Quite proud of myself for that response!

    Good luck to you!

  5. #5
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    Last edited by 2xmom; 09-26-2009 at 02:07 PM.

  6. #6
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    My middle son was also speach delayed and was in speach therapy from age 3.5 until grade 3. I had him start school a year later than normal with the extra time spent in preschool. In grade 4 he volunteered to prepare a speach (on scouting) and stand up before the whole school! He is now in grade 11 and on the principal's honour roll and loves to stage preform. I think only I can tell at times, when he gets rushed that he will drop letters in words (old habit now). You are not a bad Mom and every child grows at their own rate and own time. Before long, you will forget that he started out 'delayed' and it will become an 'oh ya moment' memory.

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    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom!

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    My eldest DS is speech delayed, and Im almost positive my 1yr old is speech delayed as well.

    We went to Tyke Talk, but found it to be a waste of time as we were already doing everything they were suggesting.. so we removed him from the program. It just wasn't for us. Now at 3.5 yrs old, he is showing amazing improvements, and he's learning more and more each day.

    We just continue to encourage him and to keep doing all those common sense things.
    They talk when they're ready to talk, and like MOF, I don't stress about it so much anymore. Its just something that is. It doesn't mean Im a bad parent. It just means my child is different then everyone elses.

  8. #8
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    My middle son was also speech delayed and didn't have more than 30 words at three.
    We went to Tyke Talk as well but found it more convenient to work at home with a private speech therapist (DH's work benefits covered the cost). All the work we did with him and I still think he just started talking when he was ready...
    Now he's in grade one in a program that teaches him the grade two English as he is actually approaching a grade 3 level in reading, writing and speech. I give most of the credit for this to our fabulous preschool teacher that had him reading at a grade two level when he left to go into Grade one.

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    If you are really concerned you could have your son checked by your doctor. Just to rule everything out and to ease your mind. Your doctor may have some suggestions for encouraging talk and potty training.

    Good luck to you.

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    I only have one LO that is 7mth so i cant relate to my own baby, but i remember when i was growing up. My mom had tired everthing with me regarding reading. I remember the stupid phonics game, cause my brother got cheesies cause he got ?'s right and i didnt. My brother learnt alot quicker than I did. he was 4yrs old reading and i just didnt want to.
    My mom was a single mom she kept on trucking and i finally got it. Now i am a Practical Nurse and my brother Designs videogames.
    So what i am saying just do what you can and everthing will turn out fine.

  11. #11
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    I also agree that people get to freaked out whenever kids develop a little slower then other kids. I also think that most of these kids are prefectly fine, they are just taking their time. My cousins daughter was sent for an assesment because she only says about 10 words so far and she is 2 yrs, 5 mos. The woman assessing her just told my cousin that while the little girls speech might be a bit delayed her motor skills are way ahead of schedule (she impressed the doctor by jumping and kicking a soccer ball in mid-air) and so maybe she just has different priorities than the average kid and there is nothing wrong with that.
    I wouldn't worry too much and not try to force him. Chances are there will come a time pretty soon when you can't wait for him to shut up again

  12. #12
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    My youngest DS was a delayed talker and went to Tyke Talk at Elborn College/ He only had 3 words at 2 years of age. Working through the program, he was able to catch up before school/ His enunciation surpassed his brother by the time he was 4. It will come, and it sounds like you have done everything right by getting him to Tyke Talk. I found that most of the work was done at home. Don't under estimate singing and music.

  13. #13
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    I am a speech pathologist who has been working with young children and their families for more than thirty years. I am saddened to hear your frustrations and your experiences with the speech and language delays of your child.
    As a speech pathologist, I can understand how it may appear that what is happening in therapy is what you already know. That is part of the magic of speech therapy. We help parents to learn how to build speech and language skills as part of what they are already doing in their daily lives. As a parent myself, I know only too well how hectic parenting can be and how the guilt sets in when one feels that one is not being a good enough parent. Be kind to yourself and know that speech and language difficulties are not typically the result of poor parenting. As parents, we do the best we can and most children develop according to typical expectations. When they are having difficulty with any area of development, it is that special parenting knowledge that draws us to services to help our children develop to the best of their ability.
    I am familiar with the programs offered by tykeTALK and I must say that they are considered a model in Ontario. Unfortunately, sometimes in the midst of busy schedules, speech pathologists don't always add that extra time to discuss with parents the reasoning for what they are doing and how in the long run it will help the child, so that the child will be able to talk when they are ready.
    Let me assure you, that for those who do get services from tykeTALK and say that the children talked when ready, I am convinced given my years of experience in the profession, that the therapy played a very important role in that progress.
    Most children will talk when they are ready and usually that starts at about 12 -15 months, however for about 10 - 15% of preschool children, this does not happen naturally, for a number of reasons anf for these children to meet with success in school and in life they need help. Delayed speech and language development, without professional help, will usually result in poor reading and poor school performance.
    When development doesn't occur appropriately in any area: vision, hearing, speech and motor development, it is important to get the help that is available, so that your child has the greatest chance of being the best person he can be. When you are not sure about the programming you are receiving, it is your right and responsibility to ask questions, so you can best understand and participate in the program.
    I wish you and your children success and encourage you to celebrate the fact that you are a caring and loving parent who is trying to do the best for your children.

  14. #14
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    [QUOTE=judyk;118638]I am a speech pathologist who has been working with young children and their families for more than thirty years. I am saddened to hear your frustrations and your experiences with the speech and language delays of your child.
    As a speech pathologist, I can understand how it may appear that what is happening in therapy is what you already know. That is part of the magic of speech therapy. We help parents to learn how to build speech and language skills as part of what they are already doing in their daily lives. As a parent myself, I know only too well how hectic parenting can be and how the guilt sets in when one feels that one is not being a good enough parent. Be kind to yourself and know that speech and language difficulties are not typically the result of poor parenting. As parents, we do the best we can and most children develop according to typical expectations. When they are having difficulty with any area of development, it is that special parenting knowledge that draws us to services to help our children develop to the best of their ability.
    I am familiar with the programs offered by tykeTALK and I must say that they are considered a model in Ontario. Unfortunately, sometimes in the midst of busy schedules, speech pathologists don't always add that extra time to discuss with parents the reasoning for what they are doing and how in the long run it will help the child, so that the child will be able to talk when they are ready.
    Let me assure you, that for those who do get services from tykeTALK and say that the children talked when ready, I am convinced given my years of experience in the profession, that the therapy played a very important role in that progress.
    Most children will talk when they are ready and usually that starts at about 12 -15 months, however for about 10 - 15% of preschool children, this does not happen naturally, for a number of reasons anf for these children to meet with success in school and in life they need help. Delayed speech and language development, without professional help, will usually result in poor reading and poor school performance.
    When development doesn't occur appropriately in any area: vision, hearing, speech and motor development, it is important to get the help that is available, so that your child has the greatest chance of being the best person he can be. When you are not sure about the programming you are receiving, it is your right and responsibility to ask questions, so you can best understand and participate in the program.
    I wish you and your children success and encourage you to celebrate the fact that you are a caring and loving parent who is trying to do the best for your children.[/QUOTE

    ....................
    Last edited by 2xmom; 09-26-2009 at 02:09 PM.

  15. #15
    judyk
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    Default Speech and language delay can be a concern

    I am a speech pathologist who has been working with young children and their families for more than thirty years. I am saddened to hear your frustrations and your experiences with the speech and language delays of your children.
    As a speech pathologist, I can understand how it may appear that what is happening in speech therapy is what you already know. That, in fact, is the magic of speech therapy. We help parents to learn how to build speech and language skills as part of what they are already doing in their daily lives. As a parent myself, I know only too well how hectic parenting can be and how the guilt sets in when one feels that one is not being a good enough parent. Be kind to yourself and know that speech and language delays are typically not the result of poor parenting. As parents, we do the best we can and most children develop according to typical expectations.
    I am familiar with the programs offered by tykeTALK and I must say that they are considered a model in Ontario. Unfortunately, in the midst of busy schedules, speech pathologists don’t always take the time to discuss with parents the reasoning for what they are doing, so some do feel that it might be a waste of time.
    Let me assure you, that for those of you who did get services from tykeTALK and said your children talked when they were ready, I am convinced given my years of experience in the profession, that the therapy played an important role in that progress.
    Most children will talk when they are ready and usually that starts at about 1 year. However for about 10 – 15% of preschool children, this does not happen naturally, for a number of reasons and for these children to meet with success in school and in life they need help. Delayed speech and language development, without professional help, will usually result in poor reading and poor school performance.
    When development doesn’t occur appropriately in any area, vision, hearing, speech, motor development, it is important to get the help that is available, so that your child has the greatest chance of being the best person he can be. When you are not sure about the programming you are receiving, it is your right and your responsibility to ask questions, so you can best understand and participate in the program.
    I wish all of you and your children success, and encourage you to celebrate the fact that you are caring and loving parents who are doing the best for your children.

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