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  1. #1
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    Default More than one special needs child?

    Okay, I think I am in denial. My other thread I said I was less anxious this pregnancy but the more I think about it the more I must admit to myself that I am really worried about the baby coming early, baby having special needs or both the baby coming early and special needs

    I keep telling myself it will be okay, been there done that and we survived but it is those thoughts in the back of your mind that sneak up on you

  2. #2
    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom! eversoclever's Avatar
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    Ya know, we don't have a typical child and I still think about having a third from time to time. Even with our crazy life and all of the challenges involved, they are our little people and we love love love being their parents. If you get a surprise like that you are a good parent to a special needs babe already, and you'll have that much more experience and knowledge the second time around.

    Statistically the chances are small that it will happen, but even if it does, you will love and be loved.

    How early were the twins? Is early delivery a real concern this time around?

  3. #3
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    The twins were 6 weeks early, so not too bad for twins. I had some issues in the beginning of this pregnancy with high blood pressure but that seems to be under control now.

    I think I will have a better idea how things are looking when I see the OB the first week of October.

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    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom! eversoclever's Avatar
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    I had high bp with DS1 and he hung on until 41 weeks.

    I hope everything turns out wonderfully for you, mama. You deserve it.

  5. #5
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    M - I can honestly say I worried my entire pregnancy and I didn't feel better until they were in my arms. Then a whole other set of worries started, those worries are now gone and now I worry about their safety daily when they are not with me. It is what we do as mothers.

    I can understand your concerns but I think a twin pregnancy is different then a single. The risk of everything are less. I know someone who had a rough twin pregnancy and then has gone on to have 3 uneventful single pregnancies and onto her forth.

    I think it is in you to worry and I am not sure I can say anything to make you sleep easier because I know no one could for me but I am sure this will go better and you will deliver a healthy, happy baby!! We will be praying for you....

  6. #6
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    Lots of hugs. Acknowledge the fear, the anxiety, it's perfectly natural I would think! i think I would be a basket case my entire pregnancy if we went for a 4th. But, you know what? There's not a whole lot you can do about it. Take it easy. Be good to yourself. You're over half way there!!

  7. #7
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    It is perfectly normal to think about the “what-if's“. Just try to keep those thoughts balanced with the voice of reason... really, are you atany greater risk of having difficulties than anyone else?

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    I would feel the same way. DH and I would have possibly had another baby but we made the decision not to for that reason. M also requires so much of our time.
    Perfectly normal to worry but don't let the worry take over. Having a baby is a very happy time. Enjoy it.

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    Hopefully the concerns will not overshadow much of your thoughts during pregnancy. I know I would be concerned if we were to go for #3, but don't know that there is much you can do. This is a happy time for you.

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    This pregnancy has been very exciting, there are times like I feel like I am pregnant for the first time because it has been such a different experience than my twin pregnancy. I actually only used diclectin for one week, last time I had to use it my whole pregnancy so that has been a HUGE difference.

    The thoughts are just those nagging thoughts in the back of my mind. Like when I have an appointment for DS and think “how would I manage booking appointments for 2 special needs children“. Just fleeting thoughts, nothing keeping me up at night

  11. #11
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    booking appointments for two special needs kids IS difficult, but it is also manageable!

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    I second that

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    its SCARY to be preggo with one after a special needs child. I was terrified heyden was gonna have some medical problem. especially heart.

    but I also knew i could deal with it. I didnt want to have to but i knew that I could so that gave me some relief.
    jennifer mommy to 4 amazing kids!

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    we have 3 sn kids. The twins we knew right from the get go they would have some delays ext. D was a big shock, he was born full term and was healthy until he got meningitis at 2 months. He has had health issues since So unfortunately it can happen at any time, even if born healthy
    Last edited by kikis6kids; 08-25-2010 at 09:02 PM.

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    Sweetie, take it one day at a time....the chance of two with special needs is less likely...hope all goes well. Enjoy the time as much as you can. I had two with needs and u know the ropes from the first, and that smile will light up your world no matter what.

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