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| Special Needs Medical, developmental, |
08-08-2010, 10:22 AM
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#61 (permalink)
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Super Big HUGS!!! Please don't change - you are a super strong woman standing up to help stop the word. Before meeting you I never liked the word, since meeting you I have a much better understanding of why I really do not like the word and how I can help make a difference by helping to educate others. I am not as strong as you with my words, and confrontation is very difficult for me however, whenever I have been able to I have tried to stop the word!
Yes it is just a word but it is just a word that can really hurt with the conotation it is used in
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08-08-2010, 03:13 PM
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#62 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eversoclever
I'm sorry you feel it 'cuts to the very core of your being.'  Words can hurt, for sure.
The secondary usage of the word when it's used to describe something stupid or lame, I would venture to say that people rarely use it with an offensive message towards the intellectually challenged in mind. And so when confronted, I think it's easy for a person to just brush it off and disregard the confrontation because they don't feel they've elected to personally slur anyone. With time, I think they'll get it -- that the association is painful and regardless of the way words evolve through common usage to have varying definitions, if it hurts others then it's just not worth it.
I once used the word “niggardly“ in a university discussion, and it nearly set the room on fire. But it was the proper usage and had nothing to do with the n-word! Try explaining that at the time though. Ugh, I'll never go there again.
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Having a child that is mentally challenged puts the word in a while new perspective for me. I never liked it before, but I didn't wanna puke every time I heard it used (negatively.) And, I agree that MOST people do not intend to offend, but you when someone calls someone a retard, I'm betting it's meant as a slur... That's when I pretty much lose my mind. But, I have never yelled at, or berated someone for using it. I have tried to talk about it as matter-of-factly and almost “gently“ - for want of a better word. I don't just open up and start in on people. I certainly try not to be confrontational. Before I talk to someone about it, I weigh alot of things. I consider who said it, where, in what contest, what I know of the person, etc. It's not a light-hearted, easy discussion to have with anyone, and as I said before... if I don't think someone will be open to it, I don't even bother. I learned that the hard way when someone actually told me to get a life, that my son wasn't retarded, that was just my opinion. Ya, ok. Conversation over!
LOL. Thanks for sharely your uni experience. I needed that chuckle today.
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The devil on my left shoulder wants me to reply, but the angel on my right shoulder is screaming: filter.....FILTER! - unknown
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08-08-2010, 11:02 PM
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#63 (permalink)
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I actually kicked someone, who knows better, for using that word tonight. well, i kicked under her chair where she was sitting for using that word.We went out for wings after ball tonight and its a very popular term. So they were all gently corrected tonight. The thing is, whether we admit it or not, words do have power. Its what vindicates us as humans, it's used to define us as a people. You speak words that reflect your intellect. I don't get the argument that words are just words. They aren't. They are powerful tools to relay messages and information. Ask a native what native canadian means to them? Ask a black man what the n word means. Ask any lesbian what homo means. They are not just words. They mean something to someone.
Last edited by SweetyPi; 08-08-2010 at 11:03 PM..
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08-08-2010, 11:25 PM
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#64 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SweetyPi
I actually kicked someone, who knows better, for using that word tonight. well, i kicked under her chair where she was sitting for using that word.We went out for wings after ball tonight and its a very popular term. So they were all gently corrected tonight. The thing is, whether we admit it or not, words do have power. Its what vindicates us as humans, it's used to define us as a people. You speak words that reflect your intellect. I don't get the argument that words are just words. They aren't. They are powerful tools to relay messages and information. Ask a native what native canadian means to them? Ask a black man what the n word means. Ask any lesbian what homo means. They are not just words. They mean something to someone.
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Seems I need to spread the love first... so,
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The devil on my left shoulder wants me to reply, but the angel on my right shoulder is screaming: filter.....FILTER! - unknown
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08-08-2010, 11:31 PM
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#65 (permalink)
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I'll rep her for you
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08-08-2010, 11:31 PM
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#66 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SweetyPi
I actually kicked someone, who knows better, for using that word tonight. well, i kicked under her chair where she was sitting for using that word.We went out for wings after ball tonight and its a very popular term. So they were all gently corrected tonight. The thing is, whether we admit it or not, words do have power. Its what vindicates us as humans, it's used to define us as a people. You speak words that reflect your intellect. I don't get the argument that words are just words. They aren't. They are powerful tools to relay messages and information. Ask a native what native canadian means to them? Ask a black man what the n word means. Ask any lesbian what homo means. They are not just words. They mean something to someone.
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But you can also give words more power than they deserve if you allow them to direct your emotions. Not saying tansie is doing this, just following up your line of thought.
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08-09-2010, 12:02 AM
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#67 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mamarazzi
I'll rep her for you 
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Guess you want me to rep ya for that, hey?
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The devil on my left shoulder wants me to reply, but the angel on my right shoulder is screaming: filter.....FILTER! - unknown
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08-09-2010, 12:08 AM
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#68 (permalink)
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Oh um... Sure!
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08-09-2010, 08:54 AM
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#69 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SweetyPi
I actually kicked someone, who knows better
LOL
I don't get the argument that words are just words. They aren't. They are powerful tools to relay messages and information. Ask a native what native canadian means to them? Ask a black man what the n word means. Ask any lesbian what homo means. They are not just words. They mean something to someone.
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I just wanted to add even the word blonde has become the meaning for stupid. Whenever I hear someone say “she's a blonde“ , etc, its mean and its meaning is quite clear.
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08-09-2010, 11:35 AM
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#70 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by eversoclever
But you can also give words more power than they deserve if you allow them to direct your emotions. Not saying tansie is doing this, just following up your line of thought.
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But here's the problem with that train of thought, words evoke emotions on principle. They are used to evoke reaction. Both positive and negative. Whether it's by fault they get a reaction more then what they deserve is a human trait and then the “more“ argument become null because it's now an emotional reaction. There are some terms in the english language that shouldn't be used in modern language anymore, but they are because they bring a desired reaction. A child learns that repeating the word “f&ck“ brings a reaction from a parent. So that means it will grab the desired attention from said parent. We're often told that we must learn to ignore the child to negate the reaction therefore the use of the word. Thing is, that lesson of using words to garner a reaction is starting to be engrained. So, as a parent we now have to teach that not all words can be ignored and we must teach the proper uses for words. That to me is the more important lesson. Teaching the proper use and connotations of words then to “ignore“ the problem. I could be talking out my arse here, because its Monday and I'm on meds right now...
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08-31-2010, 05:01 PM
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#71 (permalink)
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I saw this on FB today, and thought of this thread, I am sharing to the people on my list, I found it incredible for such a young kid. His parents should be busting out with pride for their family. (sorry if this is a repost)
YouTube - Soeren Palumbo's R-word Speech
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08-31-2010, 05:14 PM
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#72 (permalink)
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09-02-2010, 01:40 PM
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#73 (permalink)
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Wow, sent that along. What a great big brother!
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