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  1. #1
    New Member Riceroni's Avatar
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    Unhappy *HELP*In pull ups and starting School in Sept.

    I am in a real bind. I have a 3 year old who is turning 4 in September. I have him registered to start JK in September. He is at the proper level emotionally and intellectually but is not toilet trained yet.

    He will not sit on a "potty" only the toilet. He will pee standing up at the toilet only if we ask him to. He never tells me he has to go. He doesn't want to sit on the toilet to poop at all. He has never done it on the toilet. He will poop as soon as I take him off the toilet in fact. He goes into another room and hides to do it.

    Will he ever be trained? I have tried underwear instead of pull ups also with no success.

    Will they keep him out of school if I don't get him trained in time?

    Thanks, any and all advice appreciated.

    Kim
    Kim - 29

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    I'm in the same boat as you sista, except mine with holds her poop, so she ends up having large painful bowel movements and is scared of the toilet. I just wish I could make her understand that she needs to poop.

    Good luck, whatever you do. I hear at this age, kids can day train really fast, like in a matter of a few days.

  3. #3
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    I don't want to repeat anything you have tried but have you used positive reinforcers to help encourage him to use the potty. For DD stickers worked for peeing but for pooping we resorted to Dora treats which worked for her.

    DS with his diagnosis has been a lot harder to train, we use set times and visual schedules. He has started going more regularly but still does not tell us when he has to go.

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    Expert Forum User Wendy's Avatar
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    My DS was potty trained at the beginning of school but he has something going on with him right now (long story) so he is in pullups. The teacher has had no problem with it. DS changes it at each lunch (balanced day schedule) all by himself as the teacher is not allowed to help him. He does well. If you can teach him to change his own pullup he should be ok. I would try to talk to the teacher to get their view on it as well.

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    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom!

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    This thread gives me a big sigh of relief. I also have one of those 3 yr olds.

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    My DD has a late birthday - end of Oct - and was still in pull-ups in JULY the summer before jk. I was freaking, BUT was also told that NO WHERE in the Education Act does it state that your child must be toilet-trained to attend school. I had asked because my DS has special needs and I thought it only pertained to special needs. But , apparently, it was taken out in the late 90's, but teachers and principals will fail to mention this to parents.
    So, ok. Feel a little better about it, but still didn't want her going in pull-ups. Well, she finally trained about 2 weeks before school started! I was ready though to send her ina pull-up (just in case) and tell the teacher that “oh, she must hve had an accident because she is having troubles adjusting to the new routines.“ It could happen!

    Anyway, long story short... you still have over three months before school starts. Lots of time. And, if not, worry about it closer to Sept.
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    This is true. I teach JK/SK. In my meet the family days, I make sure the parents know that a full change of clothes needs to be in the backpack for accidents. If a child has a pee accident, I do my best to clean them up and put wet clothes in a bag to send home. If they have a poop accident, a parent will be called to take care of the situation.

    My advice for parents who are worried (I am one of them too!) is to work on it as best they can until school starts. If it becomes a constant issue, we can re-evaluate at that time.
    ~LBG

  8. #8
    New Member Riceroni's Avatar
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    Thanks so much for everyones replies. It makes me feel a bit better that he will not be refused to go to school. He used to be in daycare but because my husband lost his job and is now working part time midnights he is home with him all day every day. He misses the interaction with other kids and I think that that may even be the problem. Not seeing other kids his age using the toilet.

    I am going to continue working on this issue and hopefully we can beat this before September. But at least I can rest assured that I am not the only one with a 3 and a half year old who isn't toilet trained and that he may still be included in JK if it is still an issue.

    By the way. So far the incentives aren't working. I have had a giant present wrapped up on top of the fridge waiting for him to poop. He doesn't really care...lol.
    Kim - 29

  9. #9
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    Tip for the pooping - has he watched either you or daddy poop? Sounds odd and gross but my son didnt get it until he watched us a couple times.
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    This is true. I teach JK/SK. In my meet the family days, I make sure the parents know that a full change of clothes needs to be in the backpack for accidents. If a child has a pee accident, I do my best to clean them up and put wet clothes in a bag to send home. If they have a poop accident, a parent will be called to take care of the situation.
    That is good to know LBG... I imagine this might vary by teacher/school but are their scheduled potty times where everyone goes together, or reminders to go? I think my son will be fine but sometimes he can be a bit distracted by all the fun stuff going around.
    I have 4 boys ages 7, 5, and 3 and newborn

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    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom! mamabear's Avatar
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    Oh I was wondering about this too! DD (4) has been fine on the potty for months with pee, even goes to bed in underwear and never has accidents, but she absolutely will not poop on the toilet or potty. We have JK orientation next week so I was thinking about asking there.

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    JK orientation?? Do all schools do this?
    Mommy to DS Jan '06, DD July '09, DS Feb '11, DD Dec '12
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    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom! mamabear's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by princess2808 View Post
    JK orientation?? Do all schools do this?
    I dunno, maybe call and ask? We asked about it when we registered her, but they they said they call around to arrange it so we would have found out about it either way.

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    Quote Originally Posted by britmum View Post
    That is good to know LBG... I imagine this might vary by teacher/school but are their scheduled potty times where everyone goes together, or reminders to go? I think my son will be fine but sometimes he can be a bit distracted by all the fun stuff going around.
    Perhaps I should be a little more specific! I know I will help a child after a pee accident, but not all teachers will. Personally, I don't see it as a big deal. However, poop accidents are a different story. As we all know, they take longer to clean up, thus leaving the remainder of the class unattended. I am getting a new room next year and am over the moon that I have my own bathroom.

    I usually send a child to the bathroom if I see “the dance“ or they are holding themselves. I don't generally do mass bathroom runs because I can't be in two places (girls and boys) at once. I do if we are going on a trip and have an extra parent that can go with one set of kids.

    It's totally common for kids to get distracted and have accidents. I know my own kids do too, not just my students.
    ~LBG

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    Schools don't have 'potty time' mainly because there is usually only one toilet in each JK/SK room. It is a 'go when you have to' kind of policy. If a child needs reminders to go, the teacher can remind them at set times (but cannot force them to go). I have a number of kids in Grade 1 who need to be reminded to go still.

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