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  1. #1
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    Default Juggling a career with being a wife and mother?

    I always knew it would be hard to work full-time and have children, I just didn't realize how hard it would be!

    Do others feel this way? How do you deal with it?

    A few months ago I told DH that I needed more help from him and I think this is the only thing that kept me from having a complete meltdown. For two years, I did the drop off, pick up, got supper ready, got them ready to and from daycare etc. Now DH gets them ready in the morning (I have to lay out the clothes and pack their bags), but he feeds them breakfast and he now does the drop off and pick up so that I can get dinner ready in peace! What a difference this has made to my stress levels. Getting meals ready with the kids home is so difficult!

    What have you done to making juggling it all easier?

    I also believe this applies to stay at home moms since this is a full-time job too!

  2. #2
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    I have a hard time managing everything when I'm working. I have no idea how I'll do it with two of them when I go back. We are very lucky to have both of the grandmothers to watch the kids so we don't have to worry about daycare. We both work shiftwork, and I have to work every other weekend. I feel like I'm always at work and never at home. I get one day off per week, and every other weekend - soooo not conducive to family life. I just feel sick that next year I won't be home every evening to work on school stuff with DS and that things will feel even more pressured since I'll have little time at home with them for fun stuff. Ugh. I don't want to think about it!



  3. #3
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    I hear you- I'm off on Mat. leave now but working Full-time (shiftwork) was really getting to me. I enjoyed work but felt that I couldn't take care of the home and kids as well (ok now I'm going overboard and scrubbing walls and floorboards, but YKWIM).

    And holy crap I don't know how single moms do it, I couldn't do it without a partner (well maybe but the help is invaluable!).

    I'm hoping things will improve financially and I can work less come next year when I have to go back to work.
    I have 4 boys ages 7, 5, and 3 and newborn

  4. #4
    Senior Member Bitter Suites's Avatar
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    I went back to work cause I was really needed.

    I am working 244 hours in Feb. I am gone so much that I feel like a bad mama.
    I work 72 hour shifts (sometimes more) So at least I have full days in between to be home and accomplish things here
    My mom watches MissC while Mr.S is working and Then he has her all to himself in the evening...which I am jealous of

    Its tough..you're not alone =S

  5. #5
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    It's hard to juggle a career and home life... I have sacrificed my career in order to spend as much time as possible with the kids. It has gotten better since my DS#3 has started grade 1, but it's still super stressful.
    I do the drop off and pick up at school making my actual work day around 6 hours... I have turned down jobs that pay more then twice what I'm making in order to have these hours. Even then, I'm torn when I HAVE to go to a meeting in Toronto, or I'm still on the phone with an important client when it's time for me to leave and do the pick up at school.
    Some of the better tips I have for making life easier is doing lots of “big“ cooking (and freezing) at the weekends for meals that can just be popped into the oven or slow cooker for weekday meals. We also have the added stress of three kids in hockey, three kids that participate in beavers / cubs / scouts, two kids that take taekwondo lessons and one that has a track coach they meet three times a week.
    We are always on the go, so I use all my “down“ time as preparation for the next day, week or month.....
    Last edited by gogomom; 01-29-2010 at 08:52 AM.

  6. #6
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    Asking DH for help, planning ahead (meal plan, etc), learning to say “no“ and letting my perfectionism go around my house and such. If I didn't do all of these things I would go insane!
    Last edited by Jodie; 01-29-2010 at 10:47 AM.
    Jodie
    Mom to 3 boys (9, 7 and 4) &
    our little girl (born Dec 2013)
    www.brightmindschildcare.ca
    www.jodie.lovablelabels.ca

  7. #7
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    I am a single mom and I have found it challenging - to say the least and my ds father doesn't come around much, so Idon't even get that well needed “me time“...I actually am going to take a Leave of Absence from work and start my own business - this way I can be home more for my son and work in the evenings when he is sleeping...other than this, I don't know how else I could possibly do it....My house doesn't stay the cleanest, so I hired a cleaning lady to come once a week to keep it in tip top shapes (she only charges 12/hour so it is affordable really!!)...it's tough, at least your husband listened to you and is now helping you out. TEAMWORK!!!

  8. #8
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    oh I am writing all of this down keep them coming

  9. #9
    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom!
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    Just a quick note, but I completely understand. I don't think I'm coping particularly well with this at all. I have a lot of guilt about her being at daycare which makes it hard. We switched her from 5 days to 2 day so daycare in the fall and are juggling schedules, so she isn't there as much, but it has made everything else harder. Before we left London she was only doing four mornings of daycare. I just can't handle her being there full time personally.

    I don't know if it ever gets easier, but it seems like everything is a rush, I'm always behind on everything and always feel guilty about everything to do with the little one.

    I'll offer hugs as that is about all I've got!

  10. #10
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    lhastie, I do have a suggestion for you if you want to try it. My public health nurse (she comes out monthly) gave me an activity wheel to fill in. With this wheel, I could see where my time was being spent, and how I can even it out to spend more time with my son. It really helped me, and was easy to see where I could change things so I wasn't so rushed and could actually get everything done that I needed to. I added it to my website, as I found it very useful...if you want to check it out let me know and I can send you there!

  11. #11
    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom!
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    Quote Originally Posted by ayden09 View Post
    lhastie, I do have a suggestion for you if you want to try it. My public health nurse (she comes out monthly) gave me an activity wheel to fill in. With this wheel, I could see where my time was being spent, and how I can even it out to spend more time with my son. It really helped me, and was easy to see where I could change things so I wasn't so rushed and could actually get everything done that I needed to. I added it to my website, as I found it very useful...if you want to check it out let me know and I can send you there!
    Please!

  12. #12
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    ok here is the link you can check it out...like I said it really helped me so I asked for her permission to post it to my site

    ACTIVITY WHEEL

  13. #13
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    let me know if it helps you!

  14. #14
    Senior Member hopefloats's Avatar
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    I enjoy working. It provides a good balance in my life. We have a cleaning lady and wouldnt trade her for the world.

  15. #15
    Senior Member threeforme's Avatar
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    There are days it's overwhelming. We have two and are expecting our third. DH works long hours out of town and we have no family here so I'm pretty much left to do both DC drop off/pick up, make dinner and work full time (though now I'm techically off on “vacation“ until our next babe arrives and switch to mat leave).

    We also hired a cleaning lady ($12/hr) which helps a lot. I ignore the mess when she's not here! But yes, laundry doesn't get done, I'm exhausted and life is stressful. When DH is home, he's great with the kids, very involved. I try not to put too much pressure on myself to make gourmet dinners. We plan them a week ahead and some nights it's just plain spaghetti or soup and sandwiches.

    Take it one day at a time!





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