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Thread: guns and swords

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    Default guns and swords

    I'm wondering how other people deal with this or if I am being weird.

    I don't let my kids have weapon-type toys. So there's no guns, swords, etc in my house. Of course they can still imagine other things to be weapons but I don't think it needs to be encouraged.

    However, I have a friend that I met when DS#1 was about 10 months old, and our kids have played together ever since then. We don't see each other as often anymore (live in different parts of the city and have conflicting school schedules) but the other day we went over for a play date. The entire time we were there my DS and her DS seemed to be having sword fights or light saber fights, then they got sent outside with water pistols. I didn't say anything because I couldn't think of anything to say that wouldn't offend her, but now I really don't want to go over there for playdates anymore because I don't want my kids to play with those kind of toys.

    How does everyone else deal with this kind of thing?

  2. #2
    Mommy2Owen
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    I totally hate guns and swords and Mt little guy knows that. He has learned about Power Rangers at daycare. I did not like this show when my nephews watched it 10-15 years ago...and do not like it now. Owen is exposed to guns and sword play at daycare and I have no "control" over that, I figured it will get worse in public school, with a wide range of different children and backgrounds.

    All I can do is make my views known, and NOT let him watch or do anything like that at home!

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    I'm with mommy2owen. We forbid any of those types of toys and do not let DS watch those types of shows. However, once he started going to daycare we realized that not all parents share our views. He started talking about Power Rangers, was pretending to shoot things and was using various toys as "swords". I don't think there's much you can do, except explain to DS that "fighting" and weapons are not acceptable and that people can be hurt when playing like that. It's very frustrating, I know :?

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    Polly
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    edited because I didn't realise this wasn't in deep discussions. My goof

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    You don't have to change your own rules at all. If you don't like weapons, don't allow them in your home. But you're right, it's very hard to say something to another parent and not offend them.

    My gut feeling is that playing with water pistols or pretend swords isn't gonna put the kids on a path to prison. I actually think the swordfighting is great for hand-eye coordination and hey, fencing is an olympic sport, right?

    But there are no 'toy guns' (we have the supersoaker things, but they don't "look" like anything Clint Eastwood would carry if you get my drift) in my house. Zero. And I've stuck to that policy for 10 years now with no real challenges. If my kids are playing with them at other people's houses I'm pretty zen about it - I don't think I would go so far as to stop them from playing with kids who play with guns...

    Hey, have I rambled enough yet? Gah, need coffee....


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    I have girls so it is a bit different for me as they don't seem to be exposed to it as much. We don't allow guns or swords in our house and I generally discourage any type of 'fighting' game although I am slightly relaxing on this a bit.

    In other people's homes I don't prevent them from playing with swords or 'play' fighting but I still won't let them use guns. It just is something that produces such an extreme gut reaction in me that I can't be ok with it. I usually just say to the children, A&M are not allowed to play that game and then I provide an alternative. To be honest, most times my kids just won't engage in the play to begin with.

    They now have water squirters that come in the shape of animals and I am absolutely ok with that - squirting water is fun, pretending to shoot someone is not.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Polly
    edited because I didn't realise this wasn't in deep discussions. My goof
    I actually read your post before you edited it, I don't think it needs to be in deep discussions does it?! :?

    Anyway, from what I remember of what you posted....

    I guess for water pistols, I don't like the idea of pointing something at someone and pulling a trigger, even though that something is made of plastic and brightly coloured and does not resemble the real thing. I guess it's just such a short step from there to a plastic gun that does look like the real thing. We do play squirting games though - I have some of those squishy animal shaped things that you can fill up with water and squirt, and then we use those red and yellow restaurant-type condiment dispensers - 2 for $1 at the dollar store!!

    With regards to swords. I just don't like the fighting idea, although they seem quite adept at finding things in the house that they can use as swords . For hand-eye coordination we do things like play catch and other "non-violent" games, although of course any game can be turned into a violent game. Also, my oldest DS can easily get carried away with things and a friendly game of fencing can quickly turn into something rather unpleasant so I find it easiest to not let it start in the first place.

    Obviously these are my opinions and I haven't stopped them from doing things at other people's houses, I was just wondering how other people deal with this situation.

    My kids aren't old enough for video games yet so not sure what will happen then. I never really played them and they don't really get to watch TV anyway (except in the afternoons at the moment because we don't have A/C and I don't want them to run around too much in my very hot house). I'm kind of hoping they won't be that interested because they're used to minimal screen time, but I'm guessing that will probably be a pipe dream. That's something for me to look forward to in the future!!

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    It would be a simple answer for me:

    "I'm sorry but I don't allow my child to play with weapon-like toys."

    If the person asks why then I will answer by telling them of my childhood and how my oldest brother had an unhealthy fascination with swords, guns, knives... It's just not a behaviour I wish to encourage.

    It will be a little harder now that you have allowed the behaviours/actions to "slide" this time though.

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    No guns and swords here either, but I have been told by many moms of boys that it eventually comes up somewhere...and the boys love it.

    Gotta be that Y chromosome again.

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    I despise guns/swords/fighting. I have spent 3 of my ds' 4 years of life saying "No hitting! No swords! No knives! No guns!"...

    all to no avail...

    He doesn't have the specific toys, so guess what? His hockey stick becoms a sword/lightsaber/knife/gun. I piece of CARDBOARD is a gun "BEEOOOMMM BEEEOOOMMM" he says...

    I even had him to the point of seeing a toy gun/sword in a store and saying in shock "MOMMY!! Guns/swords are BAD!!" yet he still plays like this at home.

    Then we moved into our house and there are two boys living three houses down. Within three days my kids were GIVEN water guns. *SIGH*

    It's going to happen, whether we like it or not (gun/swordplay), as long as we're there go guide them and regulate the severity of the play, I think they'll be fine. I played Cops and Robbers when I was a child. I think I'm ok

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    You know, in some psychological circles, gun and sword play is not thought to be a bad thing for boys. Historically, they have been the "defenders" of whatever needed defending. (I know, I know....as well as the aggressors.)

    BTW...this is just an observation. I am not saying I condone the
    gun/sword thing............

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    Reading all these posts, the thing that comes to mind for me is
    the more you fight against it, the more they will want it.

    My older ds used to have watergun fights with the 3 boys who lived across the street from us, and what I remember most was that someone always went home in tears. We don't have any water guns anymore. We do have two tube-shaped pool toys my dh bought that shoot water, but I tell my boys not to shoot them directly at others...not that they always listen.

    My eldest loves Star Wars, so the lightsaber battles are inevitable, but I do remind him regularly it's all pretend.

    I guess that's all I really do: limit their exposure at home and remind them it's all pretend when they are watching a show with swords or guns.
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