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  1. #1
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    Default Grr on Arrears for Child Support

    I called the FRO's automated system a little while ago and of course NO payment again today (for a change ). I usually just hang up the phone in frustration at that point but I hung on today to find out how far in arrears I am now...........I yelped when I heard I'm now up to $1500+ in arrears and there's not a darn thing the FRO will do about it. My ex has to be $3000 OR not have made payment in 6 months for them to really get serious like seizing driver's licenses or whatever they do there. Point is, he always manages to stay under the radar so that they won't get serious. It's been a year and a half that this has been going on and it's no bloody wonder I'm in debt and am having trouble buying basic necessities and V is having to wait for certain things. If she's going to be disappointed about life, let it be because it's life's course, NOT because her dad won't step up to the plate.

    I'm just venting to not dump all of this on my poor DH; he's been my #1 supporter, taken care of a daughter that isn't his, walking beside me through my lovely health issues, helping me mourn a family member, etc. I figure if I just type out my frustration I can let it out and get some sleep.

    If you read this, thanks for reading,lol. It's ok not to respond since nothing can be changed anyway, except maybe the laws in 2011 at the next election time??? I talked about this with my MPP when she'd call the FRO weekly for updates. *ugh! and sigh*

  2. #2
    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom! mamabear's Avatar
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    Sorry he's being so irresponsible and you and your family have to suffer because of it.

  3. #3
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    Sorry you are having to put up with this and sorry for your daughter having to suffer because of it.

  4. #4
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    Sorry that you are going through this crap. I know that my parents divorced when I was very, very little and my dad NEVER paid a dime of child support. I also went without the little things in life that I could have used/wanted, but hopefully V will be very much like myself and totally understand what you and DH are doing for her. I have also valued a dollar a lot more and have never taken anything that involves money (or anything else for that matter) for granted.

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    I feel your pain!!! Ours is now $1700 in arrears. They had it arranged for garnishment, than he called and somehow convinced them it wasn't necessary. Haven't recieved a payment since.
    You could skip the automated and call your case officer directly. I call mine the end of each month (and sometimes middle as well) telling him no payment again and what are you doing. They do seem to be moving faster on contacting the ex since I've been harrassing them. Still no money, but telling me they are trying.
    A by the book mama to a completley healthy DD Dec.2002 and doing it all different, BWng, CDing, BLWing, crunchy mama to an equally healthy DS Nov.2008 apparently a cosleeping mama DS Aug. 2011

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mommymanda View Post
    I feel your pain!!! Ours is now $1700 in arrears. They had it arranged for garnishment, than he called and somehow convinced them it wasn't necessary. Haven't recieved a payment since.
    You could skip the automated and call your case officer directly. I call mine the end of each month (and sometimes middle as well) telling him no payment again and what are you doing. They do seem to be moving faster on contacting the ex since I've been harrassing them. Still no money, but telling me they are trying.

    Wow!......something's NOT right there. How did he manage to convince the FRO that guarnishment wasn't necessary when both parties have to agree to it?!?!
    I stopped calling and wasting my time speaking to enforcement officers; I make my MPP call them up to make changes for me, we've spoken many times and have almost a working relationship now. Their calls to the FRO has resulted in guarnishment and income taxes will be seized (when of course they're filed). But the order to guarnish took time to go through the courts; meantime things went farther into arrears. I think the rules are way too relaxed and that's something I hope to see ammended in the next provincial election. But for now, I wait........then wait some more.

  7. #7
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    My ex was well in access of arrears when a court order went to FRO to collect, so his wages were garnished, etc. from the get go (3 years ago now) and he is still in arrears but at least I know FRO are collecting it for me.

    When payments haven't been made, twice now, I've made that call to the 'human line', and it can take days to even get put on hold and then wait an hour to speak to a caseworker. They have been able to get results (usually a call to his employer while I'm on hold) and get it resolved quickly (with in 10 days).

    I've come to believe that they will not go looking for payment in arrears, that you have to bring it to their attention and they will wait till it is 30 days over due, to step in to get anything done. It is very frustrating I agree for us waiting.

    On the other side, I have a friend who is the payor of child support and he is layed off each winter as his job is seasonal. When he is layed off he calls FRO (does the whole wait thing also) and lets the know. He sets up a payment schedule, not the full amount ordered (he is not garnished) and will drift back into arrears until summer picks up and he calls back, goes through the process again, and starts to over pay the set amount to pay back the arrears. This has been happening for many years and FRO is 'happy' with the arrangement, even though his ex must feel the pinch also I'm sure.

    But its the payors that just don't pay or make arrangements that are the 'dead beat' parent.

  8. #8
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    I was under the impression that garnishment was not optional. My court order is from 1996 and SD ( sperm donor LOL ) has had his support taken from his cheque since then, the judge did not give him any choice, he also had him hand deliver his first payment prior to his first visitation to " show him what his responsibilities are ". If you are having trouble with FRO and child support you might want to talk to your local MP, I had to do it years ago when FRO misread the court order and stopped garnishment thinking he had overpaid but it was actually back support owed. After 6 months of mess ups my MP had money in hand within 3 weeks and correct amounts garnished from then on. There is no excuse for not paying child support period, in my mind.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by FlowerAngel View Post
    Wow!......something's NOT right there. How did he manage to convince the FRO that guarnishment wasn't necessary when both parties have to agree to it?!?!
    I stopped calling and wasting my time speaking to enforcement officers; I make my MPP call them up to make changes for me, we've spoken many times and have almost a working relationship now. Their calls to the FRO has resulted in guarnishment and income taxes will be seized (when of course they're filed). But the order to guarnish took time to go through the courts; meantime things went farther into arrears. I think the rules are way too relaxed and that's something I hope to see ammended in the next provincial election. But for now, I wait........then wait some more.
    I have no clue what he told them or how he worked it out. For the longest time I was getting a different answer every time I spoke with FRO. They are guarnishing his tax stuff, but since he hasn't filed since the court order was finalized thats not coming in either. I think I may look into the MPP stuff, I didn't realize they could help. He is obviously a candidate for guarnishing, so I really don't know why its still not happening.

    Than again he managed to squeeze out of not paying a dime for the first 4.5years as well, so he is capable of anything.
    A by the book mama to a completley healthy DD Dec.2002 and doing it all different, BWng, CDing, BLWing, crunchy mama to an equally healthy DS Nov.2008 apparently a cosleeping mama DS Aug. 2011

  10. #10
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    I took my ex to small claims court, and he had 4 months to catch up on $2700!!! It was very simple, (for me lol), and my ex had to make a payment schedule that day, that was acceptiable, and stick to it, or it would be garnished from his wages. He owed me some back support and he felt $50 a month would work to pay it back, I said no way.

  11. #11
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    I think because the guy I know has a payment schedule set up, he has never been garnished.

    Can anyone beat $29,000+ owed on arrears? (That also included my court/lawyer costs to take him through the court system, which he never bother to respond or show up too, so he also has court fines pending). That's what my ex was at 3 years ago and now its just over $3,000 (plus his monthly child support). Because of the ruling, he then stopped returning the money that I paid out for dental, prescriptions, etc., that his insurance reinbursed him, so I took it back through the courts..... $8,000 in my favour (court & legal costs included as he was a no show once again) to be added to the $3,000 still on the books (plus it at 5% interest). I'm guessing I will have at lease one more go round through the courts at the end of my kids educations and then... I won't have to be bothered keeping track of every penny (which I do) spent on 'our' children. If he wasn't an absent dad, I don't think I be this anal.

  12. #12
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    I know this is an old thread (never looked at this area before) ...... Donna - my ex is 17K in arrears so it's kinda close It's through the FRO as well, and no help from them at all. He doesnt have a licence anymore (so they did that) but he works under the table. I know for who, but when FRO called to confirm, his boss lied for him and they told me they had to take that at face value. Crappy.

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