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  1. #1
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    Default He wants to walk away

    So my child's father has said he wants to walk away from his kid. What do I do. I'm not happy about this, but I really think things would be easier. Do I draw up papers or what? Help? Have any of you been thought this? P.S. I'm new, be nice please.

  2. #2
    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom! mamabear's Avatar
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    Sorry to hear you're going through this.

    I would take all my questions about custody, access, and support to the Family Law Information Centre at the courthouse downtown.

    Good luck!
    Last edited by mamabear; 02-19-2009 at 10:14 PM.

  3. #3
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    That is a terrible situation to be in. I agree with mamabear.
    You'll find nothing but support here, I hope.

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    wow, that's rough. I hope the little person isn't goign to get too traumatized by his rash decision. Sure it'll be easier, but please make sure he knows what he's asking. I second the FLIC connection. Super helpful and very good resource.

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    sorry to hear about your situation....as the op have said go to the court house and legal aid

  6. #6
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    He can 'walk away' (read jerk in to that) from his relationship with his child, as he can't be forced to have one (his loss). Financially, he can't 'walk away'. You can go through the court system, FRO and have his wages guarnished.

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    sorry to hear about that, hope you go down to f.l.i.c. they helped me file papers, and told me what steps to follow. It really helped

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    You'll find lots of nice here and moms who can relate, sometimes a father walks away without actual words(in my case) and I'm very sorry that you're going through this.

    The court office downtown was very helpful to me on a different issue but they are very clear through their posters that responsibility falls upon both parents, if he wants to walk away from his blessing it's his choice but he has accountability that he can't walk away from.

    I was there back in 1996 and it was also the best decision under my circumstances but my child (DD) and I are super close; that's been very special to me.

    Take good care of yourself and your LO, many blessings!

  9. #9
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    I agree that FLIC is the place to go. I am sorry and i hope you get some support IRL and online.

  10. #10
    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom! Mommy2Cuties's Avatar
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    No advice here but just wanted to say welcome to the site and I am sorry you are having to go through this. Working with family law in BC I saw this a lot and like a previous post said you can unfortunately not make him have a relationship with his child but he does have an obligation as far as child support goes.

    I would go down to the courthouse and ask at the family law centre there I believe it is on the main floor - they should be able to help you figure out where to get started.

    *hugs*
    I stole Turtle's Lollipop! xoxo

    Nicole, mama to Miss A (April 2005), Miss K (Sept 2007), Angel Baby (August 2008), and Baby A (June 2009)


  11. #11
    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom!

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    First off. I want to welcome you to the site. Secondly, I am so sorry you have to deal with this Sending you some virtual hugs! Best of luck with everything in the end.

  12. #12
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    So sorry to hear that you are having such a rough go of it. It's too bad that the father of your child has decided not to develop a relationship with his child. It's unfortunate that at some point the child will have to deal with knowing that the father walked away but at least your child will have a loving mother to help him/her through it. I don't have any advice as I have never gone through this situation but I think the previous posts have given you some great advice of where you should begin finding some support.

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    The only way for him to truly 'walk away' would be to legally terminate his parental rights, which is a longish and fairly expensive process and to which you would have to agree - and a judge may or may not rule in favour of this. Otherwise, yes he can avoid visitation, nobody can force him to do that, but he is still financially responsible for his child.

    Sorry you are dealing with someone like this.
    LondonMoms has really gone downhill, ever since they started chit chatting in the home and garden forum. There is a place for chit chat, people!!!

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    My only piece of advise is to get legal custody and child support into the court system. Without legal custody the childs father can change his mind and walk away with the child and you have to little legal recourse. Once you have custody and child support in the courts, even if it is a token $5 a month, the law assists you.

    It takes a male to be a father but it takes a man to be a dad.

  15. #15
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    It may sound stupid but does he have a reason for just walking away? Does he feel he is inadequite as a parent? It is a very overwhelming task as we all know. Maybe he needs to speak to someone. I dont really know your situation but its seems hard for me to see someone just walking away without at least trying to fix it first.
    Sorry if I am stepping on toes.

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