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Thread: Not doing JK?

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    Default Not doing JK?

    is anyone else keeping their child out of JK? I'd love to hear from others who are considering this (for 2016) or who have already done so in the past. I don't think my son is ready (he gets anxious even talking about school) and to be honest, I think the full-day, 5 day a week program with no quiet/nap time is just too much for some kids, including my own. I'll be home with a new baby so childcare isn't an issue. We are hoping to put him in a PT pre-school/JK program elsewhere if possible though so he can continue with the socialization he has now at his home daycare.

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    My middle son just started JK this fall, and you are right - I find that he is very tired at the end of the day. But he had never been to an organized care prior to his transition to JK. He didn't even go to pre-school - just a lot of library time, OEYC, skating lessons etc.

    Having said that I am wondering if you would entertain sending him to school for a few reasons...

    1) He is already at a daycare, so he is used to being away from you.
    2) It is at "no" cost to you - I put that in quote because there are fundraisers, and pizza lunches etc
    3) You are bringing a new baby home... Is your baby your second one, or is there another child in between your son and the baby? Inevitably, you will not be able to spend as much time with him as you can now. Sending your son will give *you* a break when the baby is sleeping. With your son being 3 or 4, he will not likely need a nap at home - the baby's nap time will not mean rest for you.
    4) Your son will have to make a transition to school some time.
    5) You can discuss with your school if he can go in part time... He goes in just 4 days a week or even three days a week. I also put in some "he is too tired to go to school" days-off for my son. So some weeks, he takes the Friday off. My priority this year is for my JK'er to get used to being at school and be happy about it. I think that is the beauty of you being home for the year. You *can* give him days off where he relaxes at home.
    6) If he is having a terrible time transitioning, you can always pull him out of JK, and try again at SK! Another beauty of trying JK!

    Here are my two-cents. Congrats on the baby!!
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    My son will be staying home for jk
    Mom to DS - 9.5 years old
    AND

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    DS's school doesn't have JK, so I kept him at his preschool for an extra year.

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    My daughter won't be going to JK in the fall. I have a lot of reasons not to send her and really no good reason to send her.
    My reasons:
    - full time is too much
    - she still naps daily
    - she isn't fully toilet trained yet. or like, at all lol
    - I don't want to send her
    - I want the time with her, and realise i'm fortunate to be able to choose to stay home with her. I know not everyone can.
    - Kids change so much when they start school...I don't look forward to that. So I put it off.
    - She has friends she sees regularly at the gym daycare. She's with them about 1.5-2 hours, 2-4 time a week. She sees some
    of them every single time, other times it's a mix of other kids, too. Also a friend nearby has a girl her age who she plays with
    frequently after school, in summer,etc
    - She has never expressed interest in going
    - I don't like the size of classes, a lot of the stuff I see that they do, the number of adults vs kids

    So, she won't go.
    If she were to start truly expressing a desire to go I would let her give it a try in 2016, like in January or something.

    Now a few notes:
    My son did not go to JK, and he was not the least bit anxious on his first day of sk. In fact he was comforting some of the sk kids,
    who DID go to jk, and were crying about their parents leaving lol. It did take a bit for him to realise you had to do things that made
    no sense to him, like asking to use a washroom, but he caught on fine.
    He does great in school, has never had an issue socially really, and is fine.

    My daughter did not go to JK. For SK and grade 1 she threw MASSIVE tantums at dropoff the first day. She shrieked, clung to me,
    kicked the doors, etc. The VP helpfully explained that I "ruined her future" by having stayed home with her and never putting her
    in daycare. She claimed that was why my dd didn't want to part from me at dropoff. In SK, I sat with her in the room until she was ready
    to join -- an hour or so. She was fine from there on in. The second time the VP would not let me, and kept insisting I walk away, and my
    husband had just had surgery and was having some bleeding that day and was waiting outside with my little one and heading to emerg
    soon as I got out of the school so I let the vp convince me to walk away. I still regret that. DD bolted and chased after me, and
    it just got ugly But, by the second day, she was fine.
    In grade two, a few tears, but a brave face and in she went.
    She does fine in school. She is fine socially. She's all right.

    Just wanted to share the two sides of it, so if someone says they'll have a worse time in sk if they don't do jk, yo ucan understand nope, it
    depends on the kid more than the life they had.
    And back with them, they'd never been left with anyone but us, except super rarely. Both had that same history.
    DD1 age 7 DS age 11
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    Baby Elaina born October 28th, 2011. Making every single day that much more special.
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    I never went to jk!
    My daughter probably won't go either.

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    My oldest is a late birthday and I wasn't planning on doing JK, I was home with the other 2/3 anyways and we did OEYC, and other social things for him so I wasn't concerned. He stilled napped 2+ hours everyday and I thought it would be a bit much. Around his birthday he did start asking about school as his friends went so when the new school opened after the Christmas holidays we registered him as it was a transition time for the whole school and he went like a champ. The first day of school his teacher was not nice about it. She said he's going to be far behind on routines and everything and will have a hard time catching up. Two weeks later I set up a meeting to see how it was going and she said she had no concerns with him, he was right on track. I wasn't surprised, he is a good listener, very intelligent, follows rules and aims to please. Follow your Mommy instinct.
    That was the last year of part-time kindergarten at our school, but I have done part-time with all four of them regardless and the teachers have been awesome about it. So with DS1 he continued into SK going Monday, Wednesday and Friday. And with DS2, DS3, and DS4 (currently in JK) they have done the same thing going Monday, Wednesday and Friday for both JK and SK with no issues transitioning into grade 1 either as some people (teachers) say will happen to them. I have never had tears or questioning about going in grade 1 full-time, they know how it works.

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    I can't wait for JK because they DON'T nap On weekdays, he naps approximately 1h20m at daycare, and then I can get him to sleep about 10pm-10:30pm at night. Weekends he doesn't nap I can get him to sleep about 8pm
    My son is already in school everyday and has been since 18 months, and my oldest started school around 2.5, and neither had trouble transitioning. My oldest went every other day, and then daycare offered naps in kindergarten room but most kids sat on the mats and read books.

    When my baby was born my son was in grade 2, and it was wonderful to have that time alone with the baby, and since the baby actually napped (well, usually), I was able to nap during the day as well as get cleaning done.

    That being said, if you have time to create learning and playing situations with your child then he will be learning lots. If you will be rocking a crying baby 24/7, then school would be better. Lots of colouring books and you 2 colour together, make puzzles together (we built two 48 piece puzzles today), and going for walks to the park, and riding bikes, and drawing pictures with markers in the snow (so cool, lol), and putting snow into bins in the house, and wandering house with measuring tapes and "measuring" things

    Teachers are currently negotiating contracts, so if you don't like the FDK class size make sure you are supporting them The government will complain about how those evil teachers want more money to hire more FDK teachers, but really they just want more teachers so class sizes can be smaller

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    I do think it's good to have your child around other children, preferably some of the same children consistently to start forming
    bonds and relationship - and not just siblings. I think that's healthy. Not crucial, but beneficial But exactly like you said, there
    is plenty to be learned at home. Playing and learning go hand in hand naturally.

    Today, for example, my 3 year old was asking lots of questions about germs because I said it sounds like she's getting a cold, and
    she thought I meant she was a cold temperature, and so we talked about germs, viruses, etc. That led to wondering what her temperature was, and what fever meant.
    Then while she was cuddling because she decided she is sick and needed to cuddle, we did board puzzles (admittedly she's not good at jigsaw puzzles, neither ws her brother, though her sister was kickass at them), drew pictures (she mostly drew relatives and pets, and I drew whatever character she assigned me...sorta like playing school), and read our library books.

    Later my mom came by and dd was showing her how to use a tape measure, and how the numbers are just like counting. She doesn't understand inches vs cm, but she gets that you count in order, that 8 apples are 1,2,3,...8, that the numbers on the tape increase same as numbers for counting, and that that means if something is 5 it is bigger than something that is 2, because you say 2 first.

    That's just one day, with nothing actually planned for learning, y'know? And earlier she played lego with some boy at the library, for about half an hour. He didn't speak English, so they had to find other ways to work together but somehow they did decide that they were making an airport, and built airplanes for it, too.
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    My children both did full day kindergarten for JK & SK. My oldest went 4 days a week, youngest everyday (she is currently in SK). I work and the schedule generally worked for us; they would have been in daycare anyway.

    After experiencing 3.5 years of FDK in a great school with fantastic teachers and small class sizes (18-21 kids per class with a teacher & ECE), I don't think junior kindergarten is all that great for many children, especially children born late in the year. If a child needs care outside of the home, at 3 & 4 years old, I think a good daycare setting is better (home or centre). If a parent can be at home, that's great too.

    Many provinces don't have junior kindergarten, Ontario is an anomaly.

    Do what is best for your child(ren) and you.
    Last edited by Pomegranate; 01-25-2015 at 06:18 AM.

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    My daughter will be 4 in October and I'm not sending her to JK. I think it's too much to go to school 5 days a week for full days. If it was still half day every day I would do it in a heart beat. She will go to her nursery school 3 mornings a week.

    I kind of actually wish she could just start school a year later...like start JK when she is 4 going on 5. We're from the states and that is done a lot for kids with late birthdays. I hate thinking that I would be sending her off to college/University when she is still 17....A principal from one of the schools in the states say no parent has ever regretted holding their kids back a year and starting school a year older. Many parents have regretted sending their kids "on time".
    Last edited by staceyk; 01-25-2015 at 07:17 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by staceyk View Post
    My daughter will be 4 in October and I'm not sending her to JK. I think it's too much to go to school 5 days a week for full days. If it was still half day every day I would do it in a heart beat. She will go to her nursery school 3 mornings a week.

    I kind of actually wish she could just start school a year later...like start JK when she is 4 going on 5. We're from the states and that is done a lot for kids with late birthdays. I hate thinking that I would be sending her off to college/University when she is still 17....A principal from one of the schools in the states say no parent has ever regretted holding their kids back a year and starting school a year older. Many parents have regretted sending their kids "on time".
    When my mom went to Kindergarten they taught her all the grade 1 work, so put her into grade 2 the next year. She finished grade 13 at 17 years old and started University at 17 (turned 18 a month later). She never regretted starting university early.
    My son is born end of Nov, and he will be 17 when he goes to university, just like 1/3 of his classmates

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    Yeah I wish we as parents were allowed to choose if they start kindergarten 'on time' or the year after. With ds, I really hoped to hold back one year because of when his birthday is and the fact he is very small for his age. He's 11 now, and still only 52 lbs. But of course, they wouldn't let me.
    My youngest would be THREE going into jk. THREE.
    THREE YEARS OLD! No freaking way.
    And again, I totally understand that not everyone has the same choices I have. I am lucky that this far anyway, I can choose if I want to stay home, put her
    in daycare, or put her in school. I also don't think it's wrong for everyone, or that someone's bad if they choose 'free' jk over daycare. It just isn't something I want for mine, and unless situations change drastically and my dh loses his job or something and we need to both work f/t min wage jobs or something...
    then I'd put her in, because I don't think it'd ruin her, just don't think it's best for her, y'know?
    (And as drastic as that might sound, it has happened to us before, though we got opposing shifts so we didn't require childcare for our kids)
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    My oldest went to JK and did great from the first day. He has always been a very independent child with a laidback personality. My middle son went to JK for 2 months before I pulled him. It was too much for him. He is very attached to me and really needed the extra year at home. Both are January babies. My youngest, I didn't even attempt JK with him this year. He's a late October baby and in no way was he ready for a full day JK at 3 years old. I might have considered a half day. Even now at 4 years 3 months, he's just beginning to shows signs of wanting to go to school. I wish I could start him at JK next year and give him two years of kindergarten.

    I think you know your child best and are the only one with all the information needed to make the right decision. You will make the right one.
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    Thanks everyone for your replies. it's nice to hear from other people who are also not sending little ones to JK as well as experiences from both sides. Ingalls, you summed up my reasons pretty well for choosing to not do JK. If we can afford to put him in a preschool setting really part-time, we will, but I am not worried at all about him being "behind" or what not either way. I would love the extra time with him and they are learning so much as it is. I understand I'm fortunate to have this option for next year too. We are still going to tour our school here to get a feel for it, especially for the next year or two, but I am pretty set on not sending him. If part-time was an option and classes were smaller (I definitely don't blame that on the teachers!) I might feel differently. But since FT JK is such a new concept, and many children either didn't do it or only did it PT, I don't have any worries about him not being able to catch up. it's mostly that it would be nice for him to have somewhere to go to give him the socialization with peers his own age, and me time alone with the baby too (although my mom will be able to take him sometimes too so that helps). For those of you who send your child to a preschool, which ones do you use?
    sardam likes this.

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