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  1. #1
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    Default Help/advice for dad seeking half time with child

    I am posting this for my brother who's ex-wife, after a year and a half, is now deciding to be difficult with access to my nephew. They separated a year and a half ago and were able to come to an arrangement which, at the time, and due to my nephew's young age, was agreeable to both...the split was about 70-30, with mom having him most often. Now that my nephew is older, he is requesting more time with my brother and my brother is gladly wanting it. He's a very hands-on dad and it is in my nephew's best interest for this to happen. Unfortunately, mom is being difficult and saying no (she is a narcissist, who's ego is hurt that my nephew wants to be with my brother, she takes it personally and does not make decisions that are best for my nephew, just what makes her happy). Personal feelings aside, she has reneged on the agreed upon mediator and wants to take my brother to court. What are my brother's rights and options? Bearing in mind...she has access to unlimited legal fees and may try to draw this out so that my brother can't afford legal fees any longer...and he has to tiptoe around her and tread lightly due to her narcissism (he is afraid of making her mad, she is crazy when she isn't getting what she wants). My brother has always been more involved in his son's upbringing, even when they were together...this might be difficult to prove, she was not a bad mom, just had her priorities (work, exercise, shopping)....any advice or been there, done that would be appreciated...they live in Toronto and not in this area. Thanks.
    Last edited by calia2313; 06-02-2014 at 10:23 AM.

  2. #2
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    The thing is for a year and a half it has been 70/30 so this is what has been the status quo and courts do not like to vary much from that unless there is proof that there is an issue that its in the best interest of the child. I do not know how old the child is but if he is older 11-12 he would get some sayin what he wishes. If there is nothing in writing though I would defintely be getting something done up though as right now she could just deny access if she choose to. It sucks but thats the way the law is, believe me I feel your pain I am a stepmom to a wonerful child who wants to spend more time with dad and mom won't allow it




  3. #3
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    pretty much what sweetsteps said. The courts will generally go with status quo unless there is good reason not to. As for worrying about dragging it out family court is quiet simple and he could easily represent himself if that is a fear so dont worry let her drag her out as long as she wants.

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    Thanks for the replies ladies. I guess my follow up questions would then be...

    1. If it has to go to court, what are the chances of my brother getting 50-50 access representing himself as opposed to hiring a family law lawyer?

    2. If they do have a written agreement in the separation agreement and she is trying to deviate from that either by way of time division or child support, does he have to go to court to rectify or can he call the police...for eg., if she won't allow him to see his son for an hour on his birthday because "they are busy" or on a previously agreed upon day...what avenues, if any, besides court does he have?
    Last edited by calia2313; 06-02-2014 at 07:00 PM.

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    Expert Forum User The Ultimate London Mom!
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    Quote Originally Posted by calia2313 View Post
    Thanks for the replies ladies. I guess my follow up questions would then be...

    1. If it has to go to court, what are the chances of my brother getting 50-50 access representing himself as opposed to hiring a family law lawyer?
    court rarely give shared custody where mom and dad don't get along. the courts would most l;ikely go with the status quo OR depending on the childs age listen to the child

    2. If they do have a written agreement in the separation agreement and she is trying to deviate from that either by way of time division or child support, does he have to go to court to rectify or can he call the police...for eg., if she won't allow him to see his son for an hour on his birthday because "they are busy" or on a previously agreed upon day...what avenues, if any, besides court does he have?
    the police can not enforce an agreement unless it states "police enforceable" if he has proof of her denying access that was previously agreed upon documenmt it and ask for that clause in court

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