Child support woes

[planejane]

Ok so I already have the advice of a wonderful friend but I am wondering if there is BTDT other advice.

My ex apparently got fired the other day and he hadn't paid his child support for the month yet, I asked if I was going to get it today and he replied that didn't I get he lost his job? I understand he would he lost his job but he would still have his pay check from before since he is supposed to pay on the first. I then found out he is splitting from his current girlfriend and moving out of their joint home and he will need to be paying child support for his other child. What do I do? He is telling me he won't be able to pay and no idea when he will be able to pay. He was making more money at this previous job and didn't up the child support because he didn't have to until tax time so when I get his tax papers and he is to pay more according to his income, does he have to pay that amount?

Normally I wouldn't care about the differing amounts but he won't pay for extras for the kids, not grad, braces, trips both of our children need braces, I have already paid for the ones but now the next needs them as well. I don't really know what to do, I don't want to make his life more difficult but I am on mat leave right now, I can go a couple months with out this money but I want a guarantee I will get my back pay, and what happens with the amounts? does it make a difference that there is another child he will have to pay for? How does that work? I feel bad for my kids because he seems to think that since they are teens they don't need him anymore and his job is done.

[sweetsteps]

Are you through FRO? If not file your court order trhough FRO immediately if he's telling you he won't pay, they have the ability to stop his tax returns and even his drivers licence (if he gets that far behind). Secondly he needs to pay what is in the court order, if he lost his job, he will still have to pay the same amount unless he files a change in motion, at that point it could go down but he would still be paying something. Second child doesn't factor into it, you don't get less because there is another child, she will potentially get less then guidelines cause she has the second child but because you have the first yours doesn't get dinged cause there are more children introduced now.

Secondly if he won't pay for extras you can always file back in court for Section 7 extra expenses

[IsisBaily]

If you don't have a court order, I would definitely be getting one.
It's my understanding that he will pay more in child support for the children - HOWEVER, being that the kids are from different Mothers, it would likely count as a double-single so he'd pay the same amount for your child(ren) to you and then the amount for 1 child to her.

Losing his job doesn't give him the legal right to stop paying you all together, but it does buy him time. If you were going through FRO you would still be getting paid regardless and his debt would be to them.

I would take this to court, but if you can reach an agreement between the 2 of you that works, it might be easier and faster.

[planejane]

Our court order is about 10 years old and it just says child support is to follow guidelines based on his tax return from the previous year. I just want to make sure that if he decided to no back pay and I take him to court they can make him back pay. I understand hardship and don't want to make his life harder when I don't have to but I want to make sure my kids are taken care of.

[IsisBaily]

You can definitely take him in for back pay. When my ex's rights were terminated, one of the conditions to our agreement was that I don't file for child support in the future and claim what's owed to me in back pay. So you can definitely get it.

[hockeymomof3]

Doesn't matter how old your court order is. File it with FRO right away.

[sweetsteps]

If you don't have a court order, I would definitely be getting one.
It's my understanding that he will pay more in child support for the children - HOWEVER, being that the kids are from different Mothers, it would likely count as a double-single so he'd pay the same amount for your child(ren) to you and then the amount for 1 child to her.

Losing his job doesn't give him the legal right to stop paying you all together, but it does buy him time. If you were going through FRO you would still be getting paid regardless and his debt would be to them.

I would take this to court, but if you can reach an agreement between the 2 of you that works, it might be easier and faster.

This is not correct....FRO does not pay child support....they transfer the money and enforce the court order but if your ex owes you money FRO isn't going to pay you and wait for him to pay.

[sweetsteps]

Our court order is about 10 years old and it just says child support is to follow guidelines based on his tax return from the previous year. I just want to make sure that if he decided to no back pay and I take him to court they can make him back pay. I understand hardship and don't want to make his life harder when I don't have to but I want to make sure my kids are taken care of.

Thats not backpay though cause you have an existing order....its called arrears and yes....file it with FRO immediately and let them deal with contactong him.

[IsisBaily]

This is not correct....FRO does not pay child support....they transfer the money and enforce the court order but if your ex owes you money FRO isn't going to pay you and wait for him to pay.

Ah. Well if that's the case, so be it. The info I had was from a long time ago.

[simpsongirl]

I have been dealing with FRO for 18 yrs...and they have NEVER done that in the 18yrs I have been with them. They ONLY pay out what they collect from the one that pays the support.

[IsisBaily]

I have been dealing with FRO for 18 yrs...and they have NEVER done that in the 18yrs I have been with them. They ONLY pay out what they collect from the one that pays the support.

My source was my Grandmother. So the info I had is from 22+ years ago.
For her, my Grandfather was to pay FRO and FRO would then pay her. If he missed a payment, FRO would still pay her what he owed and then go after him for his debt. I imagine, if her recollection is true, that this system didn't work for FRO and therefore they changed their system.

[sittingpretty]

My source was my Grandmother. So the info I had is from 22+ years ago.
For her, my Grandfather was to pay FRO and FRO would then pay her. If he missed a payment, FRO would still pay her what he owed and then go after him for his debt. I imagine, if her recollection is true, that this system didn't work for FRO and therefore they changed their system.

I going to say with a pretty good certainty that her memory is off, it may well be he was a) paid up at all times or b) had an over payment to the FRO to cover times he could not pay.

[funkymom]

I am going through something similar. I'm trying to get my divorce finalized and my ex finds out there is a chance he could get laid off so now he doesn't want to sign the divorce. I made the ammendment that he could pay half of what he is supposed to pay while he is on ei, but he thinks that is too much. Am I being unreasonable?

[sittingpretty]

You can definitely take him in for back pay. When my ex's rights were terminated, one of the conditions to our agreement was that I don't file for child support in the future and claim what's owed to me in back pay. So you can definitely get it.

if his rights were truly terminated that clause would not exists sorry. Maybe no access and sole custody but when rights are terminated it means the person (in your case bio dad) is no longer dad and has no rights or obliagtions of dad. Many women think no access and sole custody mean no rights and its not quiet.

also back pay is not that easy while you can ask its unlikely to get ten years of back pay with out good reason but 100% file with FRO.

your support amount will not change becasue he is having another child the only way it will change is if you/him go to court and get it changed

[fgmoois]

Are you through FRO? If not file your court order trhough FRO immediately if he's telling you he won't pay, they have the ability to stop his tax returns and even his drivers licence (if he gets that far behind). Secondly he needs to pay what is in the court order, if he lost his job, he will still have to pay the same amount unless he files a change in motion, at that point it could go down but he would still be paying something. Second child doesn't factor into it, you don't get less because there is another child, she will potentially get less then guidelines cause she has the second child but because you have the first yours doesn't get dinged cause there are more children introduced now.