Sorry you're dealing with so many losses. I can relate a bit. I am still having trouble coping with my own dad's sudden death 9 1/2 months ago & am currently considering going for some grief counselling. My DH has EAP through work, so I'd likely go that route. I'd seriously consider the option of going for some counselling if I were you. Life can be very difficult at times & sometimes we just need help & advice from a professional to help us get through certain ordeals life throws our way. Hoping things get better for you in the near future. Thinking of you.