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  1. #1
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    Default Needing Legal Advice!

    My son's Bio-dad has had nothing to do with him in the last 3 years. Has never once tried to visit, has never asked how hes doing, nothing. No phone calls, no messages. The only time he does see Josh is when his mother has him for holidays. I took him to court 2 years ago, I won full custody and child support. He was given access as well. However, he never showed to either court dates. Since then, he has also never tried to gain access. The only thing that hes talked about in regards to J is child support. He wants me to contact FRO and have it dropped. He was supposed to pay $180 a month but doesn't. FRO was brought in automatically through the courts. I get $22.75 a month from them. That's all. And he wants me to stop taking it. I finally gave up and reemed him out. I told him that I was no longer his friend but his son's mother. And it needed to stay that way. He would talk to me about other personal things but NEVER about Josh. I would like to go back to court and revoke his rights. I'm just not sure how to go about doing that. I no longer live in London either so I have no idea where to go! I know I need legal aid because I do want a lawyer. I told him I would be taking him back to court (didnt state why!) and he said good, he likes court. He plans on taking me for access rights stating that I have denied access. Which I haven't. I have messages saved asking him if he wanted to see Josh for a bit or when he was able to come see his son. I kept giving him that opportunity. I was willing to help with rides even because we lived in a different town. Each time there was an excuse, the last one being "oh, he slipped my mind!"

    My son really has no idea who he is. He sees Daddy as my ex (the one I just left) because he was the one there since the day he was born. Not bio-dad. There's been issues with his other son now too. She's taking him back to court from what I understand to get supervised access. He's been driving around with no-licence/car seat. He's been taking him to friends places, partying with him there (drinking and drugs) not feeding him. Making him sleep on dirty mattresses. There's a hospital report where his son admitted to all of this. He had cried and told his dad he ddidn't want to go. I don't want that to happen to my son. I am not taking that chance with J. Considering my son doesn't even know who he is, I figured now is the time to do it. To take his rights. I always said that I would never do it but I want to protect my son. If in the future, he asks who his bio-dad is, I'll be honest and tell him. I'm not going to hide it from him. But while he's still young and vulnerable, I can't have this happen to him.

    I know there's google but I was hoping for personal reviews on lawyers in this area. I want someone good obviously.

  2. #2
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    you can take a parents rights away unless you have someone adopting the child.

    as long as you get support he also can have his rights ended becasue the child has a right to support

  3. #3
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    So at most, what I can do is have supervised access right? I'm really not sure how it works. I thought I could take the rights regardless.

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    Quote Originally Posted by pink-lily View Post
    So at most, what I can do is have supervised access right? I'm really not sure how it works. I thought I could take the rights regardless.
    Unless your SO is willing to adopt J, then yea if your ex responds when you serve him, saying that he wants some sort of access, the judge can (and may) grant him access, but whether or not it's supervised would be negotiable and case dependant.

    Also, even if your SO does want to adopt J, you have to make your case absolutely solid otherwise your ex can fight for his rights as blood father.


  5. #5
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    Quote Originally Posted by pink-lily View Post
    So at most, what I can do is have supervised access right? I'm really not sure how it works. I thought I could take the rights regardless.
    you can probably change your order to state

    "reasonable access upon reasonable notice"

    getting supervised access is not easy esp if there has been no access there to begin with to change it to if that makes sense.

    your best bet is speak to a lawyer

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by sittingpretty View Post
    you can probably change your order to state

    "reasonable access upon reasonable notice"

    getting supervised access is not easy esp if there has been no access there to begin with to change it to if that makes sense.

    your best bet is speak to a lawyer
    And that's my issue, I need to find one. But I want reviews on who's good in the area. I've looked up lawyers online in the area, but reading their bio's only does so much right? I want to know if anyone has dealt with the lawyers in this area and hear of their experiences.

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    Quote Originally Posted by pink-lily View Post
    And that's my issue, I need to find one. But I want reviews on who's good in the area. I've looked up lawyers online in the area, but reading their bio's only does so much right? I want to know if anyone has dealt with the lawyers in this area and hear of their experiences.
    Are you going through legal aide or paying for a lawyer?


  8. #8
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    you moved to Waterford right? You'd need to go to court in Simcoe, I'm pretty sure that's where the Court for Norfolk County is. Unless he's actually trying to have access, I wouldn't do anything for now.
    where does the time go?
    mom to DS (11) and DD (7)


  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by ladybugmama View Post
    you moved to Waterford right? You'd need to go to court in Simcoe, I'm pretty sure that's where the Court for Norfolk County is. Unless he's actually trying to have access, I wouldn't do anything for now.
    I brought up the fact that I am taking him back to court to revise the order and he's now deciding he's going to fight me. I need his address to do so and I can't get it from him so I have to find out some other way. I found a lawyer, just need to get set up on Legal Aid and go from there!

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by pink-lily View Post
    I brought up the fact that I am taking him back to court to revise the order and he's now deciding he's going to fight me. I need his address to do so and I can't get it from him so I have to find out some other way. I found a lawyer, just need to get set up on Legal Aid and go from there!
    I'd still be tempted to just leave it alone - IME, a lot of times people like to say that they're going to fight or ask for certain things, but are usually just talk and don't actually follow through. I'd be willing to bet that if you don't start a new case, he'll continue with the status quo and won't look for access. If he does try to have access, you can always refuse to allow it for all the reasons you've stated above, and then look into taking it back to court (or just be prepared that he may take it to court just to try to get you in trouble for refusing access - you can always start a motion to have access terminated then).

    be prepared as well - legal aid may or may not cover you to take it back to make a change for access - if it's to increase support, they usually will, but when he's not exercising access as it is, they may not approve you. If he was to actually start trying to have access, or if he was to start a case, they would probably cover it, but as it stands they may not. definitely get in to see legal aid though to talk to them and see what they'll cover, and see if you can get in to see the lawyer to at least get a bit of advice. some lawyers offer a free consultation, so you may be able to get a bit of advice even without legal aid.

    good luck
    where does the time go?
    mom to DS (11) and DD (7)


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    Check to see if you have FLIC(family law information centre) in your area. Thru this you can talk to duty counsel and get some free legal guidance.

    Maintain FRO involvement for child support. It is the right of your child. Support is i dependant from all other issues you may have with your ex.

    Sounds harsh but from what you have described I would suspect that there is no way a judge will revoke the fathers parental rights.

    I would do everything in my power to avoid litigation and trial... It is insanely expensive.

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    IMO you should leave it be. You've already got bio-dad almost out of your life as you state he doesn't visit. I would just stop talking to him outside of scheduling visits and I would (if the relationship is weak anyway) stop visits to anyone on his side of the family.

    Why spend $$ to prevent him from seeing his kid if he's already barely seeing him anyway?

    I don't think courts listen to he-said she-said stuff, so saying you heard he treated his other son badly when there is no actual evidence of him doing the same to yours probably won't get you very far along the supervised access route. I don't have person experience of course, just what I have heard from others.

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